Who does this to their kids?


I have to admit, though, I have always kind of liked “Moxie Crime Fighter.”

(from Lapham’s Quarterly)

7 Responses to “Who does this to their kids?”

  1. Beccaon 28 Jan 2012 at 12:31 am

    Sheese, not Jaime Oliver too! I was always horrified by the name Apple, and have had hopes that poor child never has a weight problem.
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  2. Cap Jon 01 Feb 2012 at 10:11 am

    Even Randall hadn’t thought of Moxie Crime Fighter:

  3. ariannaon 02 Feb 2012 at 2:15 pm

    I don’t think it’s *just* the celebrities, though – I just think those are the ones we get to HEAR about. And hear about quite a bit. :) Maybe it’s just vague memories from a movie I’ve seen, but I feel like I could imagine a “redneck” hollering after its child: “Engine Block, you get back here!” Or something. I was having trouble thinking of a name, haha.

  4. Cap Jon 03 Feb 2012 at 3:26 pm

    Well, now I have Jeff Foxworthy’s “You Just Might Be a Redneck” routines as earworms. Thanks for that. :-)
    Which reminds me that I saw a Chevy El Camino on the road, as opposed to it being on blocks in the front yard, last week.
    Guess now I hafta recite my fave “YJMBaR” line, which concludes with, “. . . if your mama doesn’t even take the Marlboro Red from between her lips when she tells the state trooper to kiss her [backside].”
    Would you like to co-author a submission to the Journal of Polymorphous Perversity wherein we perform a rigorous analytical comparison of celebrity children with relatively innocuous names vis-a-vis the cohort listed above? I figure we mine publicly available data on DUIs, drug overdoses, suicide attempts, bankruptcies, divorces, movie/television salaries, etc. to look for correlations. It would have a small sample size but still could have statistical power. I’ve got your regression/statistics back on that one . . .

  5. ariannaon 03 Feb 2012 at 3:30 pm

    I’m in!

    It would be a much more interesting research paper than the one I just finished, that’s for sure. :)

  6. ariannaon 03 Feb 2012 at 3:32 pm

    Plus, everyone’s heard the urban legend about “Ledashya”, right?? — If not:

  7. Marshaon 03 Feb 2012 at 3:59 pm

    @CapJ and @arianna: With your combined talents (and geek quotients), you two would be a mighty force to be reckoned with. Please use your power only for good.
    On a side note: I had never heard of “Ledashya” before. Wow. It’s amazing how many of those kinds of e-mail forwards are often prefaced with some version of “I’m not a racist, but…” Gah.
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